Monday, December 26, 2011

First, I think I have been fooled by you.
Second, I have been fell too hard.
Third, I feel so dumb.
Fourth, I feel so deeply in love with you.
Fifth, you are not mine at all.


It's kinda wasting my time for spend my whole time just for thinking of you. I knew that but why I keep doing on the same shits everyday? It's kinda tired me of. I'm sick of being like this. Tired of being sick and I'm sick with all the bullshits that you have made. I know crying will never solve these pain at all. I'm fragile inside. I just wanna scream as loud as I can. So, maybe I could feel much better. Why life have to be much harder when I grew up? Life used to be easy. But now? Yea,everything is getting harder. Actually,when I knew you. My life changed 18 degrees! I'm messed up& don't know which way that I have to choose. But, now everything's better from that shits I could learn so many things. I am the new me.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

For now being weak and stupid isn't the right choice for face the fuckin' two faced peoples out there. The strong one is the one who will win the game. Don't be such a stupid donkey. Life is extremely hard for now or even getting harder,I may think that I'm happy but you are totally wrong. HA! because I'm more than happy,this fuckin' life have taught me how to fuck the life so I can be the winner. Being weak? oh.....It's not an options. Maybe life used to be easy but I don't live there anymore. This sickness this pain are the only reason why I have to be strong. Even though everything mess up now it's doesn't mean that I can fix it all. I was born for be the strong person actually I AND YOU ALL. Yea,God won't give us something that we can not handle. Though this patience has a limit I will never give up, when the problem is getting more and more I tried to stand back from adversity. SO FUCK THE WORLD AND LET'S GET HIGH!!!

Friday, December 9, 2011

Hi there..........................

There's a lot things that you have to know. First,I'm still madly damn in love with you. Second,I miss everything about you. Third,I miss when you greeted me on my bbm. I miss when your chat was on my screen. I miss when you slept earlier than me. I miss when I re-read your chat on my history chat. I miss when the first time you chat me on Facebook and I miss when I treat you like I don't like you. I miss when I fall for you for the first time and I've been fell too hard. I miss when you made me fallin' in love with you over and over again. Yea, I know I shouldn't set my hope too high from the start. I know that's all was my fault. But,fall in love with you is beyond my controls. If I could choose,I would never choose to love you and if I know how the ends.......And actually,I miss you. I miss how we like used to. I miss you so much. Nobody's could replace you from my heart. No matter how handsome that boy no matter how smart and how charming he is. My heart have choose you. But,I'm on the process for moving on. I promise I would said "Hello! I can without you. I'm okay. and now I have someone who is a lot better than you." somedayyyy:''')

Monday, December 5, 2011

Hi December.♥

Seriously,I'm extremely excited for this month. Cause,there will be A HOLIDAY. Actually,I'm so tired with the school's stuffs. Exam Homework Tasks isn't cool at all. Even though this month I have to make decision, I won't be like this forever. I have to choose,being fooled or let him go. Yea, it's all caused by someone who I love so much and he is not mine at all. How fool? How could? Being fooled by the same type of human being,BOY that usually I called AN EVIL >:O hahahaha. Thank you for those sweet words that I know those isn't real :') And I even believe it until I realize that I have been fooled by you.

Because of all,I want holiday that probably that's all could make me forget him. For a while or even forever? I never hate you,dude. I will always remember about you for almost 2months makes me believe that there's someone love me after something terrible happened in my life you have to know actually I love you not because everything you have but because my heart have choose you to be the one but I was wrong. I'm not mean as much as you mean to me.

I'm not good at making sweet words but deep inside my heart there's only one name,and that's your name. There's nothing I can do except let you find your happiness out there though it won't with me. I'm sure that God has a better plan for me,for us. I'm not the type of girl that you want. But, there's nothing else that could love you just like the way I am. You could find another girl who is a lot better than me,and me too. I'm worth to deserve someone who's a lot better than you but for me it's need a time. I'm so done with wishing I know we have a different destiny and I can't force you to always with me. Because,for me it's more than enough to see the one who I love is have a happily life even though it without me. I know someday I'm gonna miss all the things about you:') Thank you for making me feel comfort thank you for all those things that you did to me.

Hopefully,this December I will find my own way to get my happiness.♥